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When friends exchange negative feedback

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Abstract

In four studies, we document an increase in the amount of negative feedback friends and colleagues exchange as their relationship deepens. We find that both actual and perceived relationship depth increase the amount of negative feedback people seek from and provide to each other, as well as their tendency to invest in a focal (relationship or performance) goal in response to negative feedback. The amount of positive feedback on goal pursuit, by contrast, remains stable as the relationship deepens. We attribute the increase in negative feedback to the different meaning of such feedback for people in deep versus shallow relationships: only in the context of deep relationships does negative feedback signal insufficient resource investment in the focal goal, and hence close friends and colleagues seek, provide, and respond to negative feedback.

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Notes

  1. Sample size in Study 1 and later studies was determined based on studies on research measuring seeking responsiveness to feedback (e.g., Finkelstein and Fishbach 2012). We report all data exclusions and all conditions in our studies. Following Zhou and Fishbach (2016), we tested for attrition. 6 participants dropped the survey after being assigned to condition. This number was 4 from the deep condition and 2 from the shallow condition.

  2. Following Zhou and Fishbach (2016), we tested for attrition. 30 participants dropped the survey before being assigned to a depth condition. An additional 25 dropped out after being assigned to a condition and before completing the survey: 6 from negative-deep, 8 from positive-deep, 4 from negative-shallow, and 7 from positive-shallow.

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Funding

This study was partially funded from the Templeton Foundation (New Paths to Purpose Grant).

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Correspondence to Stacey R. Finkelstein.

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The authors declare that they have no competing interests.

Ethical approval

All procedures performed in studies involving human participants were in accordance with the ethical standards of the institutional and/or national research committee and with the 1964 Helsinki declaration and its later amendments or comparable ethical standards.

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Informed consent was obtained from all individual participants included in the study.

Appendix: Manipulations of relationship depth—Study 2

Appendix: Manipulations of relationship depth—Study 2

Coworker (feedback recipient) gains depth scenario

“Welcome to the coworker evaluation study. In this study, we’d like you to imagine that you have been working at your firm for 2 years and that you are part of a team that is pitching a new product to a potential client. A coworker of yours [who is a new member of the team and has been around for 2 weeks/is an experienced member of the team and has been around for 2 years] has been asked to deliver a part of the pitch to the new client. Before your team gives a presentation like this, your team tapes a practice talk in front of a mock audience in an environment similar to the one the actual pitch will be given in. The mock audience members are encouraged to ask clarification questions if necessary but to leave other questions for after the first part of the pitch is completed.

“Your job is to evaluate the practice presentation and give feedback to your coworker. Keeping in mind that [your coworker is a new member of the team and has been around for 2 weeks/your coworker is an experienced member of the team and has been around for 2 years], we’d like for you to evaluate your co-worker and list your coworker’s strengths and weaknesses in the pitch.”

Participant (feedback provider) gains depth scenario

“Welcome to the coworker evaluation study. In this study, we’d like you to imagine that you are part of a team that is pitching a new product to a potential client. [You are a new member of the team and have only been working with your team for two weeks/You are an experienced member of the team and have been working with your team for 2 years]. Your coworker, a team member of yours who has been with the team for 2 years, has been asked to deliver a part of the pitch to the new client. Before your team gives a presentation like this, your team tapes a practice talk in front of a mock audience in an environment similar to the one the actual pitch will be given in. The mock audience members are encouraged to ask clarification questions if necessary but to leave other questions for after the first part of the pitch is completed.

“Your job is to evaluate the practice presentation and give feedback to your coworker. Keeping in mind that [you are a new member of the team and have been around for 2 weeks/you are an experienced member of the team and have been around for 2 years], we’d like for you to evaluate your co-worker and list your coworker’s strengths and weaknesses in the pitch.”

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Finkelstein, S.R., Fishbach, A. & Tu, Y. When friends exchange negative feedback. Motiv Emot 41, 69–83 (2017). https://doi.org/10.1007/s11031-016-9589-z

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