Entering into and Ending the Coaching Relationship

Abstract

Coach and issue often enter into an interesting interaction with each other. This often begins right at the start of coaching: for example, if the coachee presents an issue and an opinion on it, or an interpretation of it. Issue and issue holder become entangled and one wonders where to begin in a coaching conversation — with the issue, with the relationship between coachee and issue, or with the coachee? Just as issue and issue holder in coaching often enter into these patterns and play out recurring ‘scripts’, the coachee often plays fascinating games with his or her coach — games which are normally related to the initial issue(s) and to the subject matter of the coaching. For the coach, the dynamic of the coaching relationship may give clues to the relationship between the coachee and others and to the relationship between the coachee and his/her issues. For the coachee, the coaching relationship may develop into something meaningful — into a significant relationship which frequently springs to mind even outside the coaching conversations. More than enough reason to enter into, develop and wind down the coaching relationship as carefully as possible, and to take regular time out to consider the nature of the evolving relationship. In addition, minor frustrations in this relationship can have significant consequences for the results of the coaching. For a consideration of really difficult relationships between coach and coachee, and how to interpret and handle them, see Chapter 9.