Introduction Impossible Theatres

Abstract

In 1795, the Haymarket Theatre began its season with a light-hearted song that sums up a choice faced by late eighteenth- and early nineteenth- century performers:

When people appear

Quite unable to hear,

’Tis undoubtedly needless to talk; …

’Twere better they began

On the new invented plan,

And with Telegraphs transmitted us the plot: …

But our House here’s so small

That we’ve no need to bawl,

And the summer will rapidly pass,

So we hope you’ll think fit

To hear the Actors a bit,

Till the Elephants and Bulls come from grass:

Then let Shakespeare and Jonson go hang, go hang!

Let your Otways and Drydens go drown!

Given [sic] them Elephants and White bulls enough,

And they’ll take in all the town,

Brave boys!¹