My Only Sense of Control

Abstract

Having come from a broken home, I was verbally abusive to those who surrounded me at school, and I had very few friends to show for this. Now I understand the reason: At home I had no control and felt unsafe, scared and even vulnerable at times. I made sure that I did not have to feel like that at school by becoming a bully: I did not want others to see my weakness, and if they feared me they wouldn’t pick on me. The wake up call for me was when one of my teachers developed an intervention program, which enabled me to learn from my past and grow up and become considerate of others. During my practicum in a class with many students from a lower socioeconomic area and often from broken homes, I asked the students about verbal bullying and where students learn this sort of behavior. Many replied without hesitation that they learn it from their parents. They shared some of their stories with me, and because of my own experiences I was able to provide some guidance. From my experiences in life and placements, I have realised that most verbally abusive households result in verbal bullies in school, whether as a way for students to release their frustrations, make themselves feel better or cry for help. Teachers cannot change students’ home lives, but they can certainly give them tools to deal with verbal abuse at home and to minimise their bullying behavior at school.