Abstract
In this book, we have set out to critically examine routine epidural use by exploring the personal, social, cultural, and institutional influences on women in deciding whether or not to use epidural analgesia in labour. By examining epidural analgesia, we also aimed to gain insight into hospital birth culture more broadly. This chapter concludes the book and the key themes are revisited. We contend that dominant conceptualisations of risk and safety, which influence midwifery practice and women’s experience of birth, are mediated by the institution. We draw the discussion to a close with reference to current literature and provide key ideas to contribute to the future of humanised birthing practices.
ANNIE
No pain relief apart from squeezing him really tight.
And yeah it was amazing
The most painful thing
I have ever experienced in my life,
But just gorgeous,
Yeah, it was beautiful.
I went really quickly into active labour
Then that was it, game on, ‘Right fill that pool!’
Four o’clock in the morning she came out and perfect,
She was perfect,
It was all just perfect.
Yeah, I mean it hurt like hell
I am so glad I didn’t do anything remotely to take that away,
That’s the whole point of it.
The pain is there for a reason.
That whole experience of
Honouring her and me,
And just the whole journey of her birth
And my becoming a mum.
I can’t imagine not feeling that pain
Even though
While I was half way through it
I was like ‘I don’t think I can handle this,
I don’t think I have got what it takes
To go through this’
But then you do,
Next contraction,
You are in it,
And you just do.
For me, to not experience that pain
Is cheating
You’ve got to feel pain to grow.
I don’t think
I would have bonded with her
Anywhere near as much
If I didn’t feel that,
Feel her coming through,
Coming out.
Yeah I loved it.
You can’t explain that joy of feeling that pain.
You know what I mean.
Afterwards,
We just sat here,
Completely elated,
Blissed out, totally blissed out,
and the pain was just gone, gone, gone.
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SOPHIE
SOPHIE
Verse
Verse My brain was just pain, pain, pain! There is just nothing like that pain. Now if I had a midwife who had coupled with me the whole way through, I think that just the comfort of knowing someone intimately Is going to help you when you are in pain. You need that emotional connection, Because my brain nearly fell out of my head because my mum didn’t come, you know, I was really distraught because I thought maybe, maybe, Because I had called her at 4 o’clock And I called her at 6 o’clock And 8 o’clock. And then in the end she just didn’t bother. I was just so grateful for my auntie to be there, Who said ‘Oh I did nothing.’ But when she was speaking to other people about, like ‘Oh she doesn’t like to be touched’ Just hearing someone sticking up for me, Being on my side, was so important. It’s just too much. It’s just frying your head that you are in this much pain And you still haven’t passed out, you know. Every problem that I had Could have pretty much been solved by Being coupled with a midwife from the beginning And right through. It’s a long-term thing. People sort of think it only one day of your life, But it’s not. There is a lot of healing that you have to do. It’s not just having a wonderful baby. It’s trauma to your body. You just can’t have grief over all, You have just got to deal with it. You know, if I was pregnant again I would just be really, really Actually dreading the birth, It’s not a nice experience for me. I know some people think that it’s pleasant But the point where I broke down in tears and then you know, The midwife was saying ‘You’re stronger than that’ And I thought ‘If I was stronger than that I would punch you in the head’ I really thought ‘Fuck off’, I thought ‘That is not helping! Help me’, you know And I just thought I needed to cry, That is what I needed to do. I was exhausted. It is underestimated how much Pain is influenced by your emotional state. Fear is a big one. This interview might be providing something that makes a change, That sows a seed, When I am an old grandma and say ‘Back in my day, the medical system’, you know. If when we wave our magic wands, I would like to be a part of supporting women and I feel like this is a step towards it, you know, Just being heard, and acknowledging Women feel like they have got an entitlement And a right to choose about their own body.
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Newnham, E., McKellar, L., Pincombe, J. (2018). Closing the Circle. In: Towards the Humanisation of Birth. Palgrave Macmillan, Cham. https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-319-69962-2_7
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