“If I Am Not an Athlete, Then Who Am I?” Portrait of a Depressed Student-Athlete

Abstract

College students are faced with more than just academic challenges, and those students who struggle to find the appropriate work-life balance can become depressed and anxious. This chapter focuses on the issues faced by a college student-athlete struggling with a sense of identity. Her struggles began early in childhood, worsened in high school, and continued on campus, where she sought the help of the college counseling center. This chapter details her journey, which includes the search for a college that would meet her needs as a student, an athlete, and an individual struggling with depression and identity concerns. She undergoes treatment with therapy and medications, and she experiences worsening symptoms in the context of dealing with injuries, including a concussion. The discussion focuses on questions often faced by college students who play sports at an elite level: Is she a student-athlete or an athlete-student? Does she even want to be an athlete anymore? If she gives up what her friend described as “a golden ticket of a scholarship for playing a kid’s game,” then who is she, what will others say about her quitting, and how will she pay for college without the scholarship?