Men and Women

Abstract

The following three jokes (125, 126 and 127) are all about a common affliction for elderly people - losing their memory. Match the punch lines (a-f) to their related joke. Note: There are six punch lines, but only three jokes.

• a) “Rose, what’s the name of that restaurant we went to last night?”

• b) “Why am I knocking on wood?”

• c) “Where’s my ice-cream with a cherry on top?”

• d) “Who’s Rose?”

• e) “Who’s there?”

• f) “Where’s the toast?”

Glossary for Chapter 6

aisle

corridor

assets

possessions

barbecue

cooking device for use outdoors

be on automatic pilot

when the plane flies itself without the intervention of a human pilot

be stuck

be immobile

beckoned

made a movement with hand to indicate that he should come near her

bite one’s nails

eat the ends of one’s fingers

board

get on (plane, train, bus)

boast

talk with excessive self-satisfaction

break down

cease to function, fail

bystander

someone who happened to be there at the time

cockpit

where the pilots sit

come to a standstill

stop moving

couch

sofa

couch

sofa

discharge

be officially allowed to leave a hospital after being a patient there

drive-up window

place where you can buy fast food directly from your car

dumbstruck

unable to speak, in a state of shock

edge

side

enthused

very happy and satisfied

fired

heated

fitted with

equipped with

fix one’s gaze

look carefully

forgetful

prone to not being able to remember

freeway

main road with several lanes

gifted

talented

give someone a break

leave someone alone

give someone a hard time

make things difficult for someone

glancing

looking around

glare

look at someone angrily

gorgeous

very beautiful

gown

dress

hearing aid

device to enable the wearer to hear better

heaven

place where dead people go if they have lived a good life

honey

term of affection

keep pace with

be in line with

kiln

furnace

lawnmower

machine for cutting the grass

lips

external part of mouth

long for

really want

lunatic

crazy person

lying

not telling the truth

mascara

black line for eyes

masterpiece

best work

muster

find

not care

not worried or concerned

noxious odors

horrible, polluting smells

out of your mind

crazy

plow (GB: plough)

crash into

practical joke

trick

pretty mad

quite angry

razor

device for shaving, removing hair from face

red light

traffic light

reluctantly

against his wishes

rescue ship

a ship that would find him

retired

no longer working because have reached the age of retirement (typically 60-65)

rough draft

first version

row

transport oneself in a rowboat

rowboat

small boat powered by oars (pole with a flat side)

scare

make afraid

shaken

emotionally shocked

sheepishly

rather embarrassed

slam the gas pedal

put his foot down hard on the accelerator

sleeper car

train wagon where you can sleep

slip into

change into very casual clothes

smoothly

without difficulty

smugly

showing excessive satisfaction with oneself

sneak up

walk up behind someone quietly

stare

look with fixed eyes

startled

surprised

stern

back of boat

survive

not be killed

take off

go into the air

tapping with a cane

using the white stick that the blind (people who can’t see) use

tear

what your eyes produces when you are sad

ticket

parking fine (i.e. money to be paid to local administration for parking illegally)

tools

utensils

top speed

maximum speed

touch wood

phrase said by superstitious people

traffic warden

someone employed to make sure citizens park in the right place

turn out

reveal itself

used to

accustomed to

vacuuming

cleaning using an electric device

wash up

appear from the sea

wharf

landing place

what the heck

exclamation of surprise

wheel

push him on the wheelchair

whine

cry and complain

will

a legal document specifying how you wish your money and property to be dealt with when you die

windshield

glass at the front of a car

wove

made

wrinkle

to make unwanted lines and folds in clothes

wrong way

opposite to the correct direction

yell

shout

You bet

You’re welcome

zoom

go very fast