Tell Me How You Feel

Abstract

The therapist does not ask a question to determine the etiology of a pattern of responses. We know that they are all learned. And it does not necessarily matter how they were learned within a neuropsychological model, other than if the learning that led to the maladaptive responses was still continuing. Again, we know they were learned through association and automatization. We understand that validating the client’s emotional state is important to the therapeutic process because it is designed to ensure that the client feels both heard and understood. We also understand that this same process of validation can be both dangerous and destructive as it runs the chance of reinforcing the very maladaptive behaviors we are seeking to change. The therapist is asking for the cognitions or thoughts that are associated with a particular issue. What a therapist is really trying to do is to clearly establish all of the associated thoughts and feelings so that you have a clearer picture concerning the modifications to be made.