The Sexuality of Violence

Abstract

N ed’s childhood was nearly unimaginable. His mother died when he was three. She used heroin and cocaine on a daily basis. At times, the cocaine made her so irritable and high that she used large doses of sedatives to “come down.” Needless to say, this dangerous mixing and balancing of drugs was far from scientific. A few times a month, she would use too many sedatives and sleep for days. During these periods, Ned received no care. He was left crying in his crib. Finally, his mother left him with her parents a year before she died of heart disease caused by drugs. His father was unknown. His grandparents were caring but stern and punitive. They also were advanced in years. When he was eight, they died, leaving him with an aunt and uncle. These relatives placed him in a residential program when he began cursing, lying, stealing, and drinking, not long before his tenth birthday. As he passed from program to hospital to program, he progressed to more serious theft, gang involvement, and heavy drug use. At sixteen, Ned was placed in a foster home with the Arnolls. They were a young, religious family who had worked with people like Ned and his mother in substance-abuse treatment. They were firm and made specific demands on Ned. He attended school and the family received a daily report on his behavior. For the first time outside of an institution, Ned had a curfew and chores. His dating hours were restricted. His monetary allowance was tied to his behavior, including improvement in his language. More important, he was frequently checked for drugs, including screens of his urine.