No More Pigeons

Abstract

Data processing professionals are conditioned by their job duties to concern themselves with details and with exceptions. The successful among their technical ranks think in bits and bytes, in tiny units of information measurement. Lurking deep within each DPer’s brain is the meaning, if not the actual words, from the tale of how the term “bug” came to signify “error” in data processing.

An end-user, with little knowledge of the inner workings of the minds of data processing persons, asks a DPer, “Can pigeons fly?”

“Yes,” answers the DPer.

With furrowed brow, the DPer continues. “Unless, of course, the pigeon was just born. Or unless the pigeon is dead.

“Unless you take the dead pigeon, carefully wrap it in tissue paper, place it in a box that you conscientiously seal, and ship that box Federal Express.

“In which case the pigeon can fly.

“If that is what you mean by flying.”

The end-user, eyes open wide and teeth clenched tightly, delivers a reminder to the DPer in slow, firm tones. “All I want to know is whether pigeons can fly.”