Abstract
That people seek pleasure and avoid pain is an idea accepted by most psychologists, researchers, and clinicians, as well as any naive person on the street. Why people and animals would then apparently “choose” to suffer in various situations has been an enigma which has fascinated psychologists, philosophers, theologians, and poets. To be hurt or to hurt another is the choice in the minds of Shakespeare’s Hamlet and Joyce’s Eveline. It is also the choice facing the Bible’s Abraham, Melville’s Ahab, and Dostoevsky’s “Man From Underground,” among many others. What experiences lead to such a limited perception of life’s alternatives? The situations leading to the first of these alternatives—the “choice” to suffer—is the focus of this chapter.
Whether ’tis nobler in the mind to suffer The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune Or to take arms against a sea of troubles And by opposing end them. For who would bear the whips and scorns of time, The oppressor’ wrong, the proud man’s contumely, the pangs of disprized love, the law’s delay, The insolence of office, and the spurns That patient merit of the unworthy takes, When he himself might his quietus make With a bare bodkin? Who would fardels bear, To grunt and sweat under a weary life But that the dread of something after death, The undiscover’d country, from whose bourn No traveller returns — puzzles the will, And make us rather bear those ills we have Than fly to others that we know not of? Thus conscience does make cowards of us all. Shakespeare’s Hamlet, act III, scene 1
She had consented to go away, to leave her home. Was that wise? She tried to weigh each side of the question…. Down far in the avenue she could hear a street organ playing. She knew the air. Strange that it should come that very night to remind her of the promise to her mother, her promise to keep the home together as long as she could…. She stood up in a sudden impulse of terror. Escape! She must escape! Frank would save her. He would give her life, perhaps love, too. But she wanted to live. Why should she be unhappy? She had a right to happiness…. She felt her cheek pale and cold and, out of a maze of distress, she prayed to God to direct her to show her what was her duty. The boat blew a long mournful whistle into the mist. If she went, to-morrow she should be on the sea with Frank, steaming towards Buenos Ayres. Their passage had been booked. Could she still draw back after all he had done for her? Her distress awoke a nausea in her body and she kept moving her lips in silent fervent preyer. A bell clanged upon her heart. She felt him seize her hand:
All the seas of the world tumbled about her heart. He was drawing her into them: he would drown her. She gripped with both hands at the iron railing.
—Come! No! No! No! It was impossible. Her hands clutched the iron in frenzy. Amid the seas she sent a cry of anguish!
—Eveline! Evvy! He reached beyond the barrier and called to her to follow. He was shouted at to go on but still he called to her. She set her white face to him, passive, like a helpless animal. Her eyes gave him no sign of love or farewell or recognition. Joyce’s “Eveline” (1914/1969)
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Curtis, R. (1989). Choosing to Suffer or to…?. In: Curtis, R.C. (eds) Self-Defeating Behaviors. The Plenum Series in Social / Clinical Psychology. Springer, Boston, MA. https://doi.org/10.1007/978-1-4613-0783-9_8
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